The Protocols of the Elders of Zion

Goyim are mentally inferior to Jews and can’t run their nations properly. For their sake and ours, we need to abolish their governments and replace them with a single government. This will take a long time and involve much bloodshed, but it’s for a good cause. Here’s what we’ll need to do:

• Place our agents and helpers everywhere.
• Take control of the media and use it in propaganda for our plans.
• Start fights between different races, classes and religions.
• Use bribery, threats and blackmail to get our way.
• Use Freemasonic Lodges to attract potential public officials.
• Appeal to successful people’s egos.
• Appoint puppet leaders who can be controlled by blackmail.
• Replace royal rule with socialist rule, then communism, then despotism.
• Abolish all rights and freedoms, except the right of force by us.
• Sacrifice people (including Jews sometimes) when necessary.
• Eliminate religion; replace it with science and materialism.
• Control the education system to spread deception and destroy intellect.
• Rewrite history to our benefit.
• Create entertaining distractions.
• Corrupt minds with filth and perversion.
• Encourage people to spy on one another.
• Keep the masses in poverty and perpetual labor.
• Take possession of all wealth, property and (especially) gold.
• Use gold to manipulate the markets, cause depressions etc.
• Introduce a progressive tax on wealth.
• Replace sound investment with speculation.
• Make long-term interest-bearing loans to governments.
• Give bad advice to governments and everyone else.

Eventually the goyim will be so angry with their governments (because we’ll blame them for the resulting mess) that they’ll gladly have us take over. We will then appoint a descendant of David to be king of the world, and the remaining goyim will bow down and sing his praises. Everyone will live in peace and obedient order under his glorious rule.